Fixer Upper Party Pooper

Phoebe, my wife, is into Fixer Upper; the show with Chip and Joanna Gaines. So by default, I am, too. They’re our friends. If Phoebe and I lived in Waco we’d be antiquing and hanging out at Magnolia Farms ALL the time. But for now, we just visit them on the TV, although Phoebe has become a little jaded…

Steve
Which house do you think they’ll pick?

Phoebe
I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. It’s a scam.

Steve
What?

Phoebe
They already know the house. They have to buy it and close and get permits so they already know before the show starts.

Beat.

Steve
I’m ok with that. I get it. It’s TV. It’s just a slight sleight of hand.

Beat.

Steve
C’mon. We still don’t know what happens to all the new furniture, or if-

Phoebe
It’s staging. Just staging furniture. The people can buy it, but it’s all for the show. It has to be returned.

Beat.

Steve
What about Clint?